Sometimes it sucks. And I don’t mean lower-case ‘s’ sucks. I mean it SUCKS so fucking hard you’re POSITIVE you’ll give yourself stomach cancer or an embolism as you try to make your spouse explode through telekinesis. When you relax, however, and remember that you’re a bigger asshole than they are, with enough neuroses and calcified bad habits to warrant their own card catalog, you realize that they’re struggling through life’s shit storm just like you. Then you take a shower together and fuck while laughing.

— 

Rob Delaney, “Take a stroll… with Rob Delaney - I am suing Kim Kardashian”

Relationships

Last night, Matthew woke me up at about 4:30 a.m. watching Trapped in the Closet Chapters 13 - 22 very, very loudly.

I should have been really mad or annoyed, but I just laughed and went back to sleep.